Saturday, February 09, 2008

I have to assume that I have completely and permanently

I have to assume that I have completely and permanently fucked things up now with my ex-girlfriend, and it really is time to move on. I wish I had time and space to reflect on our relationship, to write about it.

Someday I will try. Today - tonight, I must go dancing. I can not let one sweet, shy girl cause me to bottle up and hide away all that I've got to share with other ladies. I should have tried to do that when I had this seemingly solid good thing with the ex, but I am wild, full of wild talk, but I never cheated.

I just tried to hard to change the world, and not hard enough to buy new house, furniture, Roman holiday.

I don't know that I could holiday in Rome - there would be too much work to do. I had really hoped back in 2005 that FAO (based in Rome) would have launched a biodiversity inventory in Aceh, and follow my lead on aid to rubber smallholders, with reforestry using native plants with economic value (e.g. rattan)

A Balinese holiday, after a few months work in the jungle - that is another thing!

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